Happy International Women’s Day! I find the women in my life to be such a joy. What do you love about the women in your life? Take a moment to text or call someone you are thinking about right now. Be present to what you are feeling right now! Take a small action of appreciation.
Traveling with Women Friends is Different
Me and my roommate, Christina.
I’ve been thinking about friendship a lot lately. Like many people, I’ve felt very disconnected during the first couple of years of COVID. And the feeling has lingered. I realize as a coach, I can change that. Now, if I don’t find myself truly engaged in a conversation, I take responsibility and ask better questions, dig a little deeper, share a little more, and find topics that can be mutually enjoyed. I flirt with the edges of what is socially acceptable. As a result, I am feeling much more fulfilled in my relationships.
I’ve been on two trips this year that put me in the company of women in new ways. I thoroughly enjoyed a trip to Costa Rica with my longtime friend I’ll call Betty. We spent 7 days together and had an amazing time. The second trip was a cruise with a group of people interested in The Fast Metabolism Programs Haylie Pomroy created. I got matched with a roommate I didn’t know who became a dear friend on the cruise. I also met over 40 other women on the cruise. It was a much different experience travelling with women instead of my husband and sons.
Here’s a quote I love about travel and self-exploration:
“We travel, initially, to lose ourselves, and we travel next to find ourselves.”
— Pico Iyer, The Art of Stillness
Here are some things I learned while traveling with women:
- Many women plan their lives around meals — it isn’t an afterthought. Traveling with women has a cadence that starts with food as the foundation and builds the other activities around it.
- Most middle-aged women wake up pretty early. We were often up and about by 7 am.
- Women care about feeling seen. Traveling in a group can bring up feelings about inclusion and exclusion, even in middle age. Guys don’t notice this as much, in my experience.
- Women are happy to share. We shared sunscreen, lipstick, jewelry, dreams, fears, insecurities, and almost everything on these trips. There was talk of boundaries, but most women are incredibly open.
- Feelings about money are incredibly diverse with women. Some have great skills in this area, while others worry and have challenges.
Here are some things I learned about myself:
- I never felt lonely on these trips. There was deep conversation, laughter, affirmation (“I love that dress!”), and joy for me.
- I don’t need much alone time when I am traveling. I was shocked by how little time I needed alone. I went on some of the excursions on the cruise by myself, and I missed the others. I like being in the community.
- I like traveling light. After the Costa Rica trip, I bought a new Carry on Closet suitcase and went on the week cruise with only a single bag and a backpack. Sure, I missed a couple of things while I was on the trip (dressy shoes, 2nd swimsuit, a swim cap, and goggles), but nothing I couldn’t buy while I was travelling. And now that I am home, I remember how much lighter it felt to just have my carry on, and I loved not waiting for a checked bag.
- After 4 trips in 2 months, I also like to be home. I learned there is a balance to how much I want to travel. In the past, I always thought the answer to How much do you want to travel was “more!” After several trips in a row, I realize I’ve had my fill of travel for a while and am happy to be home right now.
I’m curious about you. What are you thinking about travel and friendship? Is there anything you want to change about your own experiences with either of these? What is your first step? Feel free to hit reply or comment and share your thoughts. Your intention to change is the first step.
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